Chat to your neighbour, it's good for your mental health – and theirs
DR MICHAEL MOSLEY: Chat to your neighbour: it’s good for your mental health – and theirs
- Eight per cent of Britons don’t have real friends, according to recent survey
Most of us feel lonely occasionally — and while spending time alone has its merits (the inventor Thomas Edison famously declared ‘the best thinking has been done in solitude’) — there is nothing positive about that soul-crushing sense of loneliness that comes from feeling you have no one to talk to or to support you.
Sadly it’s a common problem. In a recent survey of 3,000 Britons, 8 per cent reported that they didn’t have real friends and most of their social interactions are online.
I’m not a very gregarious person, but am fortunate that my wife, Clare, nudges me into being more sociable.
And like 39 per cent of those surveyed who said their best pal was their partner, I would say she’s my closest friend and greatest emotional support (and sometimes also my greatest critic).
The problem of loneliness has only got worse: four million people in Britain suffer from chronic loneliness and the number who report feeling lonely ‘often or always’ has gone up by nearly 20 per cent since the start of Covid, reports the charity Campaign To End Loneliness.
So when you see your neighbour, give them a wave — and chat!
They found that women are more likely to report being chronically lonely than men. This is possibly because women tend to live longer, so there are more widows than widowers.
We are intensely social animals, which is why being lonely has such toxic effects on us; not only can it lead to anxiety and depression, but also to poor sleep, heart disease, stroke and premature death.
The rise in loneliness is partly linked to changes in working practices, which mean that people spend more time at home on computers, and also to the closure of branches of banks and post offices and, as the Mail has reported, community pharmacies.
READ MORE: Are YOU lonely? Psychologist reveals 12 subtle signs – and the reason other people might not notice
Queuing in a bank or post office, or getting your prescription, is not exactly a great social outing, but for many it is a lifeline; an opportunity to have a brief chat with another human being.
And even having brief chats with a stranger can make a difference to your mental health — and the stranger’s.
For example, when I buy my morning coffee, particularly if I’m in a hurry, I usually order, tap my card on the machine and run.
But a 2014 study by the University of British Columbia in Canada found that encouraging people to smile, make eye contact and have a brief conversation when ordering a cup of coffee, not only meant that the person buying the coffee got a boost to their happiness and sense of belonging, it also added to the happiness of the server.
Similarly, when I’m in a supermarket I always use the automated checkout to avoid getting caught in a queue behind someone who’s nattering with the cashier.
Now a Dutch supermarket chain, with the delightful name Jumbo, has discovered that there is a real demand by some customers for exactly this sort of interaction.
So it has created special checkout counters, ‘chat checkouts’, where customers and cashiers can have leisurely chats without someone like me standing behind them, biting their lips and looking at their watch.
The chat checkouts have proved so popular they are being introduced in most Jumbo stores.
Getting a pet is another way to fight loneliness, particularly if you’ve recently lost a partner, as a 2019 study by Florida State University showed.
Dawn Carr, a professor of sociology and the lead author, pointed out that pets not only provide companionship but also unconditional love (well, at least dogs do).
‘You can talk to your dog,’ she said. ‘They’re not going to tell you you’re a bad person, they’re just going to love you. Or you can pet your cat and it’s calming.’
For many, having a pet is not practical. Soon robotic versions may be an option — and research suggests they could really help.
In a recent study by the University of Plymouth, robot cats and dogs were given to care home residents.
While not state-of-the-art, these were cuddly, made suitable noises and moved around a bit.
READ MORE: Being lonely is as bad for you as obesity or heart disease – and three million Britons are hit by it. But as our inspiring guide proves… You CAN beat loneliness and this is how
Despite being only one step up from fluffy toys, the robotic pets helped reduce anxiety and depression and had a calming effect.
The best way, however, to combat loneliness is to be brave, get out into the world and interact with others.
And starting close to home may be easiest. I recently interviewed Pamela Qualter, a professor of psychology for education at the University of Manchester, who’s an expert on the importance of social relationships, and she told me that performing small acts of kindness for your neighbours is a particularly powerful way to reduce your loneliness.
She was one of the lead authors of a trial where people were asked to do a kind act for a neighbour once a week, for four weeks.
This could be doing something practical such as taking out their bins or simply having a chat in the street.
Results showed that this not only reduced both the giver and recipient’s feelings of loneliness, it also increased a sense of neighbourhood unity.
‘Knowing that your neighbours care about you really does bring a community together,’ Professor Qualter told me.
At a time when more people feel isolated, feeling you’re part of a community, something bigger than you, is hugely important for mental and, possibly, physical health (now being assessed in a three-year UK research project called Common Health Assets, which is evaluating the effect of community-led organisations on health and wellbeing).
So when you see your neighbour, give them a wave — and chat!
Test to spot Alzheimer’s early
Dementia is the leading cause of death in the UK, so understandably there was a lot of excitement this week after trial results of a drug called donanemab suggested it can slow the rate of cognitive decline in people with very early disease.
The drug is similar to two others that previously made headlines — lecanemab and aducanumab — they all work by getting rid of amyloid, a protein that builds up in the brains of Alzheimer’s patients.
But these new drugs are expensive, have significant potential side-effects and are only effective when given to people early. For the drugs to be game-changers we need to diagnose dementia as soon as possible.
Dementia is the leading cause of death in the UK, so understandably there was a lot of excitement this week after trial results of a drug called donanemab suggested it can slow the rate of cognitive decline in people with very early disease
Now researchers at the Karolinska Institute in Sweden have developed a blood test, which they say can predict Alzheimer’s with 80 per cent accuracy, almost a decade before people develop symptoms. (It measures levels of a sugar called glycan: raised levels have been linked to dementia.)
This is by no means the only or best way of detecting dementia, but this kind of simple, cheap test could form the basis of a screening method to spot people when there’s still time to help them.
Honey and vinegar kill off bacteria
I love stories about traditional remedies, once seen as a bit crackpot, finding their way into modern medicine.
Take honey, which the ancient Greek physician Hippocrates claimed ‘cleans sores and ulcers, softens hard ulcers of the lips and heals carbuncles and running sores’.
He also said rubbing honey on the scalp could cure baldness.
While honey is no longer used for hair growth, it is recognised as an effective treatment for certain types of wounds, including leg ulcers.
Honey kills bacteria, even antibiotic-resistant bugs; it draws fluid out of them, which destroys the source of infection and reduces swelling and encourages the flow of white cells to start wound healing.
Manuka honey – a rare type of honey from New Zealand – features a slew of health-boosting properties, including the ability to fend off winter illnesses, support gut health, heal wounds, soothe sore throats and so much more
Hippocrates was also a fan of mixing honey and vinegar as a tonic — a decongestant, he said, it also ‘promotes flatulent discharges from the bowels’ (the sign of a healthy gut, as he saw it).
While there’s been lots of research into the health benefits of either honey or vinegar, there’s been little on the combination.
But in a study published this month, researchers at Warwick University found that a mixture of honey and vinegar is far more effective at killing bacteria than when either is given alone — and natural vinegars, in particular pomegranate vinegar, are especially powerful.
More research is needed before doctors start prescribing a honey/vinegar tonic on the NHS, but with drug-resistant infections on the rise, ancient remedies may prove a useful option.
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