If You’re A Virgo, Ask These Questions On The First Date

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By Camila Barbeito/Sept. 1, 2021 10:39 am EDT

After a meet-cute at the airport, or a great dating-app-connection, you’re ready to take on the all-important first date. Nervous? Probably. But the butterflies in your stomach are warranted: as per Psychology Today, that first date can determine if you’re headed down the wedding aisle — or leaving that next text on read. Not so much about the dress you choose, although you already might have gone through 15 outfit changes, but much more about the initial spark. The outlet cites a 2006 study that “suggests that early communication plays an important role in the formation of romantic relationships,” so yeah: witty banter and back-to-back quips are key in taking the date to the next level.

Of course, you want your first date to be smooth. To quote Taylor Swift’s “Begin Again,” you want to “throw your head back laughing like a little kid,” and whether it’s “on a Wednesday at a café” (via Genius) or a movie night, you want fireworks and passion. Still, subtly asking the right questions is crucial to make sure future compatibility is there. As relationship expert Dr. Jessica Griffin told HelloGiggles, a good first date is all about the “balance between keeping things light [and] gathering the data you need to decide whether or not this individual may be viable relationship material.” So go out on a limb and run barefoot through the beach after dinner, but never forget to ask the questions that matter to you – especially if you’re a hardworking, ever-diligent Virgo.

Are they practical or impulsive?

While you still want to keep it cool and not make your first date a job interview, it’s important to get a read on how rational — or spontaneous — your date is. As a Virgo, you’re much more on the strait-laced side of the equation: Allure explains that those under this sign usually put logic over emotions. But Virgos still love an impromptu night out — in reality, the maiden sign is all about work hard, play hard. Even though Virgos might get a bad rep around the zodiac world for being square, as earth signs, they love exciting adventures. Still, Virgos are the zodiac’s “computers,” so it’s important to make sure your date is compatible with your meticulous nature.

Virgos are known to be cerebral, and you prefer to work hard for your success, finding comfort in routine (via Astrology Zodiac Signs). You’re actually very ready to take a spur-of-the-moment trip to the Caribbean to live out your Jack Sparrow dreams — but you’ll never leave big things like relationships or your work to luck. Pay attention to your date’s attitude about reason, logic, and the future: a person that’s a bit too relaxed about the important things might irk you in the long run, and you might constantly want to “fix” them (via Costar). While nobody is perfect (not even Virgos!), look for someone who can push you towards the wild edge when you need it, but will still complement your goals for success.

Can they enjoy nature with you?

On to the lighter questions — because not everything can be that deep on the first date. Virgos are earth signs like Capricorns and Tauruses. But while Capricorns exhibit their grounded nature by money managing, and Tauruses are happiest sitting and admiring the sky, Virgos are a middle-ground between the two. As explained by Allure, Virgos are earth signs represented by the goddess of agriculture, so feel at-home amidst fields and flower beds — just picture “The Sound of Music” (really). Yes, Virgos love work, and if the zodiac was a “Sex and the City” rerun, you would probably be a Miranda (yeah, we went there). But when you’re not rooted in your desk typing away, or all-in-all saving the world, Virgos love to get lost in the purity of nature.

Just like Virgo signs have a work hard, play hard mentality, your “playing” doesn’t just involve after-dinner drinks, karaoke, or past-4 A.M. nights at the club. Rather than overly-enjoying getting dressed up to paint the town red, maiden signs feel like they can finally let go of anxiety when around mountains, trees, the beach, or rolling hills. Ask your date how they feel about going on hikes, fun bike rides in the park, or taking early morning dips in the ocean. Does nature fuel them like it does for you? As per Astrology Zodiac Signs, Virgos hide a precious, ever-sensitive pearl in their hard, impenetrable shell — but the wonders of nature help you open up.

Can they teach you about self-love?

Virgos need a partner that will help them unwind and take a break from their packed schedule. Out of the entire zodiac, maiden signs are most likely to forget about their own needs, especially when life’s hurdles get in the way. Virgos are known to put their loved ones before themselves, and won’t second-guess staying late at work to close, or put in the extra hours to make that end-of-the-quarter project remarkable. As per Astrology Zodiac Signs, people under this sign lose sleep over the possibility of messing something up at  work, and it is difficult for Virgos to quiet their thoughts. Since Virgos let their anxiety get the best of them and drown in their worries, they need a partner who can pull them out of that hole when they need it and teach them about much-needed TLC and self-care.

While on your much-anticipated first meet-up, be hyper-aware (something you’re great at!) about your date’s attitude towards self-love and downtime. While someone who’s extra-dedicated to their own career and life might connect to your perspective, a relationship between both of you can be too rooted in perfectionism, and might stress both of you out. While Virgos are seriously detail-oriented and are scientific in their decision-making and the way they choose their path in life (via Allure), a partner who teaches you the benefits of couch surfing, drinking wine on the porch, and face masks might be everything you needed.

Do they prioritize helping others, too?

It’s no secret Virgos give more to others than themselves, and often forget about their needs in favor of saving the day for others. As cited by Allure, Virgos are natural helpers. That’s what makes caring doctors, soul-healing yoga teachers, understanding veterinarians, or some of the best-ever preschool teachers. Virgos are known to give great advice, and they’ll run out of their house in pajamas at 2 a.m. if a loved one needs them. While they are affectionate friends, in reality, they’re more about concrete, specific guidance. Sure, a positivity pep talk is great, but Virgo’s logician edge means they prefer to think up a plan and set it in motion.

So Virgos are helpers — but their partners don’t always understand this facet to them. As per Astrology Zodiac Signs, this sign truly cares the state of the world, and prefers to prize other people’s needs over their own, especially if that means being able to avoid their complex emotions. According to Costar, Virgos sometimes build up someone else’s home while their own house is falling apart, much to the dismay of their partner. All their hard work and overstretching is usually for the sake of others, which can be difficult for this sign’s loved ones to comprehend. Ask your date questions about their attitude towards service and community to get a glimpse on possible issues in the future, but also think about how a different perspective might teach you about self-love. 

Do they like to cook at home?

Sure, it’s a simple question, but for Virgos, it’s an important one. This sign loves cooking at home, so choosing a partner who’s just as ready to make homemade meatballs, cilantro rice, and fresh garden salads is crucial. Virgos are earth signs, so they love working with natural ingredients pulled directly from the earth, making something cozy and nourishing. Just like a Virgo will get wrapped up in a sunset hike, finally letting all that stress soak away, cutting up in-season vegetables can further ground Virgos and let them meditate on just living. When cooking with a partner, that means a surefire, holistic connection.

As per Allure, Virgos rule the digestive system, and they have a special talent for pairing together the right ingredients and flavors. Thoughtful to a fault, this sign is sensitive to every spice and every dash of salt, making them excellent chefs. According to Costar, Virgos are Einstein-esque when it comes to their approach to life, and will love wooing their partners with their near-scientific culinary creations. Moreover, just like their Capricorn planetary siblings, Virgos are frugal when it comes to money (via Horoscope), so picking a partner who prefers low-key cooking dates at home rather than fancy restaurants is crucial. Even Virgo’s natural perfectionism influences their love of cooking at home, since it allows them to keep their meals as healthy as can be. This sign runs through life like a fine-tuned motor, so clean cooking is key.

Do they have an open, trusting communication style?

It’s no secret that communication is all-important for any couple, regardless of zodiac signs. As clinician and owner of Tech Talk Therapy Dr. Connie Omari told Bustle, “communication is important in relationships because it’s the single most useful way for partners to connect. Moreover, clinical psychologist Shelley Sommerfeldt, PsyD explained to Healthline that for couples, “communication is important because it fosters trust and connection” and makes for an “open” and “honest” relationship. Of course, if at the first-date stage, your communication will be a mix of nerve-wracking, deeply romantic, and startlingly new. Still, it’s important to notice how much of a communicator your date is, because Virgos are all about lengthy conversations and intellectual stimulation.

According to Allure, Virgos are ruled by Mercury, which governs communication. Although this sign is more about tons of (over) thinking and analysis, they still love a good conversation, and fall in love through words. Astrology Zodiac Signs cites Virgos as natural writers, noting their natural conversationalist approach, banter, and way with diction. While Virgos don’t need over-romanticism like like dozens of roses, expensive gifts, or shouting “I love you” from the rooftops (via Costar), you do need a balanced mix of profound love and fun, easy, relaxed friendship. Check your date’s communication style: Virgos pair best with someone who is open, talkative, and who can get you back in touch with your own needs desires, which you can sometimes forget if you’re not careful.

Can they balance your judgmental side?

And last, an important subject that will come up in almost every Virgo’s relationship eventually: judgement. Virgos are all-star helpers, are the hardest-working bees in their hive, and make for the most thoughtful friends and lovers. The good is very good, but just like everyone else, Virgos aren’t perfect (the horror!). They can be judgmental, and this usually becomes the main source of conflict in their relationships to other people.

Since people under this sign are major perfectionists, they notice everything around them: whether it’s a number that seems off at work, a faint stain on a shirt, or a flaw they see in a partner (via Allure). That same studious nature that allows them to excel in their career can make Virgos difficult to be around, because they truly think a faultless utopia is achievable — even in their partners. This sign doesn’t really understand flaws can be beautiful, and instead of laughing off a partner’s mess, or kissing away past scars, Virgos’ need for perfection makes them doubt their love much more than other signs.

Virgos have a clear definition between what they believe is right and wrong (via Astrology Zodiac Signs) and as per Costar, are judgmental without even realizing it. That is why it’s crucial for a Virgo to pick a partner with a strong sense of self-confidence, who isn’t weighed-down by critique. Moreover, get a read on how relaxed your date is — they might show you a thing or two!

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